Men, Don’t Make Your Wife Lead Your Family!

Unfortunately, many women become the leaders of their families by default because their husbands have either deserted the home or abdicated their God-given responsibility to lead. This is another side of the impact of the fall.

C.S. Lewis observes that most women instinctively understand that there is something wrong when they must be in charge.

“There must be something unnatural about the rule of wives over husbands, because the wives themselves are half ashamed of it and despise the husbands whom they rule.”

When those who are called to be in leadership vacate the role, they leave a vacuum that must be filled by another. Why is this the case? Leadership is difficult. Leadership is a responsibility, and sinful selfishness resists responsibility or accountability. “Paradoxically,” says Ash,

“it may not be the challenges of secular feminisim that pose the greatest threat to God’s order of marriage, but the pathetic abdications of sinful males who will not take upon ourselves our God-given reponsbility to exercise headship in our marriages and in our home.”

The way to relieve our wives of the temptation to take over is to recognize that leadership is our responsibility and to step up in obedience to be the loving, sacrificial leaders he has called us to be.

Question for Reflection

  1. Men, are you leading your family to know God, accomplish His purposes, and glorify Him?


The Shepherd Leader at Home, Timothy Witmer, 85


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